Karl H Christ
4 min readAug 10, 2020

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Anti-Maskers are Pussies

Please excuse my use of “pussy” as a slur. I know that pussies, while very sensitive, are also incredibly resilient, strong, and beautiful. Anti-maskers have little in common with literal pussies other than their extreme sensitivity. But it’s a language they understand, and my god, these people are the biggest, whiniest, saltiest bunch of pussies I ever did lay eyes upon.

Wearing a mask is easy as fuck. Once you’re in the habit, you do it without a second thought. Going to be indoors with other people? Wear your mask. Passing near someone else while stalking the streets? Pull your mask up. I don’t even think about it anymore. I affixed an elastic band to my favorite mask (yes, I have a favorite mask) so that it can hang on my neck when I don’t need it but I always have it ready when I’m out. On hot days, can it get uncomfortable breathing and talking through a mask for long periods, particularly when working or running? Of course. But I go on wearing it when in close proximity to other people, in places and situations where there’s potential for airborne viral transmission, like everyone else who’s not a complete pussy.

Wearing a mask during a pandemic is not a sign of weakness. Bitching and whining about being asked to wear a mask, however, sure is. Think of the kinds of professionals who wear masks regularly: doctors and nurses, construction workers, soldiers, ninjas, chemists, biohazardous waste cleaners, mad scientists, superheroes/villains, deep sea divers, fumigators, miners, cowboys. Every one of those is a badass profession done by badass people. The people who do those jobs are tough as hell. They’re not cowards, cowering in fear for the state of their poor immune systems and weak internal organs. They recognize the hazards of their jobs and meet them with intelligence and reason. Many of them are required in the course of their jobs to wear their masks for hours on end. The masks worn in most of these professions are hardcore, too. The kind that completely seal off a person’s breathing holes in the cases of oxygen- and gas-masks, and are still pretty heavy duty for the disposable kind medical professionals and construction workers wear. They wear those masks so long that they begin to forget what it’s like to breathe normally, and deep bruises are imprinted into their faces. What they do voluntarily and with dignity is far more onerous than what we’re being asked to do and ratlickers are throwing infantile tantrums about.

If so many of us can wear masks while working, running, biking, or any other strenuous activity, you can bear doing it for twenty minutes while shuffling through a supermarket. If not, there’s something seriously wrong with you. The right-wing rat-lickers who claim they feel like they’re suffocating after mere minutes of mask-wearing are melodramatic pussies of the most pathetic order.

The other difference between what we as civilians are being asked, sometimes mandated, to do during this pandemic is that we are meant to wear masks primarily in order to keep from spreading viruses we might be carrying to others. It’s not as much about protecting ourselves. It’s a selfless act, arguably a little heroic, and I don’t want to live in a world where selflessness and heroism are treated as weakness or cowardice. Scratch that-- I don’t want you to live here if that’s your way of thinking.

We’re seeing in this pandemic and the hubbub about masks that white American men are the most pathetic pack of pussies in the world. Not to say that there aren’t female crackers and people of color acting like selfish jackasses, but once again it is male crackers who lead the charge for stupidity and deranged selfishness. These pussies cry and throw fits at the suggestion of wearing a mask in a Costco. These are the same guys who boast about pride and independence, yet they fall apart and lose their shit like little bitches because an overworked and generally disinterested store clerk asked them to put a piece of cloth over their mouth.

It really shows the fragility of machismo, not necessarily invented by cracker men, but championed to death by them. It’s a facade failing to cover their cowardice and insecurity. They cover up their opposition to mask-wearing with talk of freedom and choice, and they deride those who wear masks as being weak or effeminate, all of it a projection of their own poor sense of self. Brazil’s fascist shitstain president Jair Bolsonaro has famously said that “Wearing masks is a faggot thing,” not long before he’d contracted Covid-19, and may have infected everyone around him. As usual, the bullshit bravado, along with sexism and homophobia, is a shield that fails to hide how insecure and weak the bigot who uses it is. Men like Bolsonaro and Trump and all the idiot right-wing rabble who’ve made mask-wearing a matter of politics and manhood reveal they have no place in the former and possess very little of the latter. They’re just a pathetic punkass pack of pissy little pussies.

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